They were right, cancer does suck…

I haven’t really talked about it much, because it’s just been overwhelming with everything else going on. Apparently, the cancer I talked about in a previous protected post is pretty freakin serious and serious scares the crap out of me.

I’ve done some research — the outlook, at least according to the sites I read, is pretty bleak. But I’m gonna fight, of course.

I’m taking a medication that makes me shake a lot — but that it’s it sole purpose — it’s also supposed to help reduce the size of the tumors I have on my liver, so that when surgery takes place, the chances of getting it all is increased.

In addition to the medication I’m taking — there is also talk of targeted (or direct, I can’t recall the word) radiation. This possibility actually scares me a lot. This impacts everyone around me and most importantly, it impacts Jerrett in a huge way.

But then again, so does not having treatment — so when things are more set in stone, I’ll have a sit down with him and we’ll talk about the options and see what he thinks.

Overall — this is just…overwhelming. I try not to cry, but I do. A lot. I am trying to ‘get my affairs in order’ as a good friend, Teresa, suggested — but that’s proven to be damn near impossible due to other circumstances.

So…bleh.

A few friends have said they don’t know how to react or respond to me — so I’d like to go ahead and put it out there: Right now, emotionally, I’m trying to ignore the elephant in the room, so please just treat me like you would if I weren’t ill. I want to have fun, do things and go places — that hasn’t changed, yet.

Related posts:

1. I Had A Swell Day – Seriously =)
2. Tomorrows post won’t suck…maybe
3. When the parent of a special needs child has needs of their own